A Stupid Thing
December 16th was the last day of classes before winter break, and the day I put on two class parties. I struggled with my load of party stuff out to the van, accompanied by two walking children pushing the third in the stroller.
That right there was one stupid thing, because asking a six-year-old to push a stroller in a linear manner, and stay on the sidewalk, and without a power struggle with her five-year-old brother, well, that's just crazy talk.
So anyway, I had a major headache, and I was stumbling along with my giant rubbermaid tub of party crap, and sort of bleary-eyed. Every twenty seconds, I would bark out "get away from the curb!" or "let your brother have a turn!" or "stay on the sidewalk!" We got to the van, and I tossed the tub in the back. The kids bickered while I unloaded the baby from the stroller, and I put her into her seat while barking things like "just sit down!" and "both of you!" and "shush!" and "NOW!"
I leaped into the driver's seat and tore off towards home, still barking commands.
Meanwhile, back on the sidewalk, my stroller sat there, patiently waiting for me to load it, and my son's backpack.
Did I remember? No. Did I even notice for the entire Christmas vacation? No.
Someone found it just sitting there forlornly, and hauled it up to the office, where it sat abandoned. I picked it up yesterday after the principal called me and said something about "two weeks" and "left on the sidewalk" and "some woman found it." I blocked a lot of that conversation out.
I picked it up, and smiled meekly as the office ladies clucked their tongues at my forgetfulness. I stammered excuses about being sick, but in my head, I wanted to yell AT LEAST I REMEMBERED TO TAKE THE KID.
Really though, that's a wonder in and of itself.
Comments
You have nothing to be ashamed of. It's only been two weeks, it sometimes takes me that long to figure out if I've left my zipper down after using a public restroom.
Posted by: ben | January 4, 2006 10:50 AM
I'm getting a glimpse of my future I just know it.
I'm scared
I knew a lady who almost drove off with the infant seat (with child in it) on the top off her little car. Yipes.
Posted by: Trishfreak | January 4, 2006 10:59 AM
Oh. There's nothing like experiencing 'forgetfulness' in times of extreme stress and having people know about it.
I feel your righteousness. I once was so happy to get a front parking spot at Wal-Mart that I grabbed my purse and grocery list, and headed in. Only when the greeter said 'Hello' and asked me about my two year old did I realize that I'd left her in the SUV six feet away! Now that same greeter says 'Hello' to me and my toddler, then asks me about my other two girls...
Posted by: Erin | January 4, 2006 11:12 AM
I'm with you - as long as all warm bodies are with you, anything else forgotten is forgiven.. Jeez Louise. It's not like you set a child on the roof of your car and took off driving. Did you?
:)
Posted by: holli | January 4, 2006 1:52 PM
Dude. You got all THREE kids. That right there is huge. HUGE, I say! Seriously. Ask me how I know.
Posted by: Elaine | January 4, 2006 2:03 PM
When we brought our first home from the hospital, my (then) husband put the diaper bag on the roof of the car while he put the baby in the car seat. Then we merrily drove off without it. The hospital called to tell us they had it and we could pick it up. I'm surprised they didn't insist we return the baby.
Posted by: Dawn | January 4, 2006 2:07 PM
Ha! Thats pretty much par for the course in my life as well. Like you said, you remembered the kid.
Posted by: R*Belle | January 4, 2006 2:12 PM
Clucked their tongues at you? You should yank their self-righteous tongues out of their pompous mouths and serve them with chianti!!!
Posted by: Shanonn | January 4, 2006 3:30 PM
Hey, as long as you counted heads and had them all, the stroller is a bonus. Some days, the baby is a bonus.
Posted by: Carmen | January 4, 2006 7:18 PM
I'm with everyone else here, Jenny. As long as you have all three kids, the rest is optional. And really some days, I'd trade at least one of the kids for the backpack.
Posted by: buffi | January 4, 2006 10:24 PM
In my head I would have yelled, YOU BITCHES ARE JUST JEALOUS CUZ I KNOW WHERE TO GET THE GOOD CRYSTAL METH.
All the while acting like a total lady.
Posted by: GraceD | January 4, 2006 11:08 PM
Doh! And some people wonder why I mumbled "1,2,3,4,5" all day long.
Posted by: Katie | January 5, 2006 5:44 AM
I'm reading your account of the kid-juggle and the loading and bleariness, and I'm thinking "wow, she held it together pretty well. If it were my family, there would have been children screaming and I would have driven home with one door hanging open."
I drove away from the grocery store without loading my trunk one day. And I left the six-week old baby in the car while going inside to get his sister from preschool-I just plain forgot he was sleeping in the car.
Posted by: MamaKaren | January 5, 2006 6:29 AM
This made me laugh so hard - because it's so ridiculous, isn't it? The room party mania? I remember one year, on the last day of school before Christmas break, when I was walking out of school surrounded by a class of dazed 2nd graders whose room mothers had been so zealous in planning the party that they'd been rushed from project to project to project, their little hands covered with papercuts and glue and glitter, bruised from handing scissors, arms laden with enough crafts for them to start their own craft shop. Poor little tykes! All they really wanted, probably, was some cookies, punch and a nice game of Bingo.
Posted by: Melanie Lynne Hauser | January 5, 2006 7:14 AM
Ha! That is too funny! I do the same thing, if I can count all the heads that's the important part! Obviously the tongue cluckers don't have three kids! One kid is a breeze, two and you're not outnumbered, but three...you should get a medal for your badge of motherhood!
Posted by: The Cake Lady | January 5, 2006 8:00 AM
I totally would've packed the stroller and left the baby on the sidewalk. You did fine. ;)
Posted by: Mir | January 5, 2006 11:24 AM
I left my $200 dollar stroller outside during this past storm we had and I discovered yesterday it was covered in mold. So of course, I cleaned it off with wet wipes from the diaper bag and stuck the kids in it. A little mold never hurt anybody, right?!
At least you went back for that thing. I might have left it there forever.
Posted by: Mary | January 5, 2006 1:07 PM
Do you ever just get that quick panic attack while in the car that you DID leave a kid somewhere???
Posted by: shellie | January 5, 2006 3:28 PM
Well, you know, if they hadn't Shut. Down. The. School. for two weeks, I bet you would've remembered sooner!
We have fancy little kid-backpacks for hauling our twins around in, and in late November I noticed this weird wiffy smell in the trunk. I mentioned it to my hubby, thinking perhaps the windshield washer fluid had leaked. I'd discovered one of the baby backpacks was wet, so I figured it had borne the brunt of the leak.
Hubby investigated and discovered that it was actually the two bottles of unpasteurized apple cider we'd gotten in late October during the last farmer's market, stuck in the pocket of the baby backpack, and then left to ferment in the car for a while before freezing (thus exploding out of the bottle), and then thawing to release that lovely homemade vinegar scent.
I agree - you remembered all three kids, that gets you at least a "C" in Parenting 301. :D
Posted by: Thorny | January 5, 2006 9:43 PM
Keep up the great work on your blog. Best wishes WaltDe
Posted by: WaltDe | August 31, 2006 11:20 PM