Made.
While folding a load of laundry this afternoon, I got sucked into that MTV show "Made" - I hadn't seen it before. This one took a nerdy kid and made him into a break-dancing B-boy.
Oooh! My little heart was all a-flutter. I know, I should come to terms with the fact that I'm a thirty-three year old fat woman, but I want to be a break-dancer! I can see dropping the kids off at school, and then throwing down a flattened refrigerator box and kickin' it old school style with the other moms. And then maybe a little trip to Starbucks.
Sounds pretty great, huh?
Okay, for those of you who are new readers - I guess I should explain. I've always had this thing about making up scenarios. It doesn't take much to get me off and running either. Take the hula hoop situation. I discovered that I couldn't do it. I couldn't hoop. Man, I was bummed. Then someone suggested a sports hoop. Then came an innocent flyer about a school hula hoop contest at the ice cream social. And before you know it, I'm boasting about strutting into the contest with my own custom hoop to pounding theme music.
So, needless to say, it doesn't take much to set me off.
Break-dancing! Yes! I updated my netflix queue to include a family friendly beginning break-dancing DVD and I'm already planning my outfit. Big Slice is in the house!
I promised a contest, and I'm still giggling over my mental image of my breakin' debut. Let's do some haiku again -
Alright - prizes will be awarded to the 'kus that tickle my fancy.
Your topics:
- Hula hooping
- Bikram yoga
- Break-dancing
- Schoolyard Showdown
Go! Get your haiku on! Refresher: three lines 1st line five syllables, 2nd line seven syllables and 3rd line five syllables. Have fun with it!
OH WAIT! I just talked to Jenn over at Hip Mom and Trendy Tweens, and we want to make a little mischief and spread the love around to our ClubMom blogger sisters. You get extra brownie points for every extra haiku you leave (without explanation) in the comments one of our fine ClubMom blogs. In fact, go post some haiku on your own blog, and trackback, and we'll all have some fun. Whee!
Comments
Round and round and round
it goes, where it stops only
Big Slice can know
Downward facing dog.
My ass only goes
so high, yoga bitch.
Crap. I think I pulled
something again. Getting too
old to dance, Ladies.
Kicking sand up on
Jenny’s snow white Keds? Oh no
you didn’t. Rumble.
Posted by: Elaine | July 18, 2006 7:57 PM
Plastic hoop of pink
Looks so enticing to me
But big hips don't help
Posted by: marlen | July 18, 2006 8:10 PM
We mock your topics
We mock your Big Slice panties
Tweens mock everything
Posted by: Jenn | July 18, 2006 9:05 PM
I wiggle my hips
and sway. So sexy! Too bad
the hoop fell down. Bah.
Posted by: Mir | July 19, 2006 5:26 AM
Namaste! Now stretch.
And breathe. And stretch. And... oh, crap.
I'm... stuck. Little help?
Posted by: Mir | July 19, 2006 5:29 AM
Breakdance? You jest, yes?
I'm lucky I can just walk
without falling down.
Posted by: Mir | July 19, 2006 5:33 AM
Would love to do more
but I must go save my floor
from the mess-makers.
Posted by: Mir | July 19, 2006 5:35 AM
don't step on my grid
I'll hopscotch right over you
bring it sistas, now!
Posted by: kelly | July 19, 2006 7:37 AM
I won a ribbon
hula hooping in sixth grade
and I've still got game.
Company picnic
A contest for the children,
but I get pulled in.
Showed them how it's done!
But my swirling hips are not
so professional.
Posted by: MamaKaren | July 19, 2006 7:40 AM
Again, Mir arrives
Flinging about her haikus.
She's a haiku ho.
Posted by: Grace/MarathonMom | July 19, 2006 7:44 AM
I see your breakdance
and raise you some graceless feats
backflips in the lake
Posted by: Dawn | July 19, 2006 9:55 AM
Recently I learned
It's hard to do the robot
when you are pregnant.
Sorry...it's constantly on my mind.
Posted by: Jenn2 | July 19, 2006 10:14 AM
I can do the snake
but only when I am drunk.
I don't think that counts.
Posted by: Jenny | July 19, 2006 10:49 AM
Breakdancing is hard
Can't do the worm thing at all
Will you help me up?
Posted by: marlen | July 19, 2006 10:59 AM
A schoolyard showdown
Gonna kick her dancin' butt
I've got mad dance skillz
Posted by: marlen | July 19, 2006 11:01 AM
When the hoop goes round
it gets stuck between my rolls
and won't spin at all
Posted by: Kristen | July 19, 2006 11:12 AM
It gracefully swirls
'Round my waist, over my hips
Oh f*ck now it's stuck.
Posted by: Carrie | July 19, 2006 12:38 PM
Can’t dance like Musa
Love me that “…Think you Can Dance”
Break baby Break!… down.
Posted by: Kari | July 19, 2006 1:02 PM
Hi Jenny- love both of your sites. This is the first time I am commenting but the Haiku looked to fun to resist yo. Here is my try at Haiku
1st
Mad Hula Hoopen
Go- Go Big Slice- Go Big Slice
Waz my name- Jenny Fool
2nd
Breakin, dancin fool
watch my spin come around gen
Groovin that breaks rulz
3rd
It's schoolyard showdown
here comes my moves- kickin butt
breaken hula cool
4th
Yoga twist and bend
when you think its almost done
hold that pose- more fun
Posted by: Venus | July 19, 2006 1:09 PM
Taking the wieght off,
then, oh no! It's back again!
Hoola hoop diet.
Posted by: Mrs Wright | July 19, 2006 3:06 PM
My ass fits inside
The circle turns round and round
Oops! There go my pants!
Posted by: Kari | July 19, 2006 4:22 PM
How shameful it is
when the hula hoop gets stuck
around my huge butt.
Posted by: Becki | July 19, 2006 6:29 PM
Gloomy sullen teen
If you can't be nice, be gone
Mom needs alone time
Posted by: Kate | July 19, 2006 7:26 PM
Bikram yoga, why?
Get all sweaty in warm room
Tantric is better
Posted by: Anonymous | July 19, 2006 10:58 PM
Why do bikram, huh?
Husband would get wrong bad thoughts
Don't want to put out
Posted by: Jen R | July 19, 2006 11:11 PM
Got my cool sneakers.
Music thumping from beat box,
Bling won't hide big belly
Posted by: Sher | July 20, 2006 1:10 AM
The weighted hula
Gives me bruises everywhere
Makes me look beaten
After Thing 2's birth
I did the hula daily
And got my abs back
But I don't own one
I'm way too cheap and frugal
My birthday's coming
I tried Bikram once
Again, for a free trial
I am so Scottish
Posted by: the womom | July 20, 2006 6:55 AM
Bikram is badass
Sweating bodies wall to wall.
Warning - athlete's foot.
Practicing Bikram
Doing my best to keep up.
I slip in my sweat.
Sure, laugh at Bikram
Silly yoga in the heat.
But, I've lost ten pounds.
Posted by: Grace/MarathonMom | July 20, 2006 9:58 AM
Big Slice rocks the house
Break dancing in the school yard
Bikram Yoga next
Posted by: Deborah | July 20, 2006 11:31 AM
This totally is
cracking me up so much that
I may pee my pants
Posted by: Jen R | July 20, 2006 1:56 PM
Sometimes I'm just slow
But I'm into the Haiku
Could it be too late?
Posted by: tracey | July 24, 2006 6:32 PM